When One of Your Best Friends Gets Engaged

One of my favorite stories is how I met my friend Stephon. He and I met through one of my best friends, Ashley. And now he’s basically my boyfriend…although I can’t really call him that anymore. He’s my husband now? Baby daddy? I don’t know, now that this has come up, I’ll have to ask him.

Once upon a time, Ashley’s best friend Manny was dating Stephon. They would all hang out, but there was something slightly missing. You see, Stephon is a total foodie and is a little boujie…so sometimes they wouldn’t want to try places he did, and sometimes he got a little tired of the food places they liked! Bottom line…no one would try the food places he wanted to try. (Ashley still mentions the time he tried to get her to try lobster bisque).

Fast forward to Ashley’s birthday, when she introduced me to Stephon for the first time. I had already known Manny, and although I had already known his partner and his other friends…I had never met him! We immediately bonded when we sang “Hands to Myself” in the car and annoyed everyone else, and when we went to Starbucks and he said he loved my ankle booties. The next time I saw him was at Ashley’s actual birthday dinner, when we complimented each other’s outfits (obviously this is how all great duos begin), and totally bonded over dinner. Ashley then not-so-casually suggested that we hang out, as she is notorious for pairing people together, and after we each waited a few days to seem chill, we texted each other.

The first time we hung out was when we went to Cafe Ba-Ba-Reeba for dinner, and since then we have consistently went on various adventures. Anywhere Manny and Ashley don’t want to go….we go. Whenever I want to try a food place, he’s the first person I text. And he has been my “boyfriend” for almost a year, and a truly great friend. When Bernie made me mad last spring, Stephon and I went on an epic brunch adventure (where he showed me THE BEST brunch place). When I was stressed about exams, the two of us went to Davanti Enoteca for dinner (where we had a quasi racist experience, but that is besides the point). And earlier this year when the Max thing hit a high, Stephon dragged me on a date night to Cafe Ba-Ba-Reeba. He has always been there for me, and such a phenomenal friend.

He’s one of my very best friends, and although I knew this day would come, when it happened I was still just as shocked. He got engaged. And I am so freaking happy.

It’s a strange feeling, when the first one of your best friends gets engaged. You wish them all the happiness in the world, and watching a couple that you’re so close to makes you believe in love in this crazy world. They are one of my favorite couples in the entire world, as I have never seen to people perfectly clash, but compliment themselves in the way that Stephon and his partner do. We always see the couples who meet in a cute way, that perfectly stay together effortlessly and easily. But that’s not how real life works, and that’s not how true love works.

True love is when the universe conspires (or Ashley conspires) to bring the two of you together. True love is when you push each other to be the best, and when you absolutely adore each other, although you are not perfect. It’s when against all odds, and even when you might try to ignore the signs, the two of you are always seamlessly and effortlessly brought together.

It’s definitely made me think about my life, and how differently it’s turned out. I’m not going to lie, when I was a little girl I imagined that I would be madly in love with my college boyfriend, preparing for grad school and then riding off into the sunset.

But then I realize that what I was looking for back then was a prince, and now…I want a partner. I want someone loyal by my side, to help me through the bad and the good times. Because I don’t need a prince to fight my battles or to save me…because I can save myself. I just want someone who’s coming along for the adventure.

And right now, I am okay with the pace my love life is going and I am okay with being single. Because I have all my loved ones and friends to support me and to be there for me.

People always freak out when their best friends get engaged, but honestly, it just made what I want in life that much clearer. And it reminded me exactly what true love is. And that it exists.

I’ve been non-stop trying to come up with the perfect words for their engagement card, but I think ultimately I have to say this.

You guys have always reminded me of what exactly love is, and I am so incredibly grateful to have both of you as friends. I’m so happy for you, and so thrilled that you have found someone spectacular in each other to take on this next chapter of your lives, and that I’m around to see it happen.

Congratulations on your engagement.


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