I originally was going to make a recipe post for you all, a pretty millennial Martha Stewart recipe post that was supposedly going to knock your socks off. Or you were going to be like, “Okay Chrissey…..you wrapped some cheese and jam in a crescent roll and baked it. I went to the store, bought all the ingredients to make brie bites, and well…..this happened.
Yeah. That happened. I felt like someone had absolutely punched me in the gut, like I was a complete and utter failure, and that everything had gone completely to shit. I have messed up many a recipe, but this particular loss hurt very, very badly.
You have have a super, strong guttural reaction to something that is really just you subconsciously reacting to something else going in your life? This was one of those.
As I looked at my brie explosion, I just felt so defeated. I was so ready to kill this recipe and have one singular thing go well this week…..just one thing. But even the simplest recipe got so messed up. Like way to kick a girl when she’s already down!
This week has been the longest week of my life. It also, in retrospect, has been one of the worst weeks of my life. There’s been a couple things that have been extremely difficult to navigate. Without getting too crazy–it’s testing my patience, resilience, and composure in all sorts of different directions. Really, mostly my patience, because more than one time this week I wanted to just get up and drive off into the sunset. But that only happens in movies and we’re adults here.
And in real life, even if you don’t agree with certain things, and people who are just so awful seem to be “getting away” with a lot of things without consequences, you may not be vindicated in that moment, but it’ll be okay someday.
A mentor I really adore once told me that when people test your patience and make you really really shitty, you pull yourself together, keep it together, and silently say “thank you” as you walk away. Because every difficulty, obstacle, or situation that really tests you is pushing you further along in your destiny along to the next step of your life.
i’ve been thinking a lot about that. The next step of my life, or journey, so to speak. And I’ve been thinking a lot about what I want in life and the things I want to do. And I’ve decided, now more than ever, I’m going to go after those things, and I am going to be strong. Even when it gets really, really hard to be strong.
Because in those moments especially, you need to be the complete badass you are.
And as I thought about that, I thought about the few good things. Sometimes, you gotta think about those. The few little good things that have happened this week have me feeling energized and really excited for the future. And maybe, struggling right now, feeling frustrated as f–k right now is just testing my fortitude and strength as I move into the next chapter of my life.
The brie bites turned out not-so-bad.
Here’s to those few little good things.